AmosL
10-22-2006, 02:53 PM
HINENI: Coming Out in a Jewish High School’
Amos Lassen and Cinema Pride
When I first heard about this movie, I looked everywhere to try to get a copy. No matter where I looked I found brilliant reviews and powerful reactions but I could not seem to locate the film. I finally made contact with a group in Boston named Keshet (Hebrew for rainbow) which produced the film. Keshet is a support group for Jewish gays and lesbians and if this movie is an example of the kind of work they do then they have made quite a mark on the lives of our community and have done something that they can really be proud of. I, personally, have only had minor problems reconciling my Judaism with my gayness and I arrived at inner peace after a great deal of soul searching, self pity and inner conflict. I, finally, was alone to make peace with myself and G-d, but when I watched “Hineni”, I wished that a film like that had been around when I was dealing with my issues.
“Hineni” which is Hebrew for “here I am” is the story of a young girl’s attempt to establish a gay/straight alliance at a Jewish high school in Boston, Massachusetts and how that attempt affected everyone around. But even more than that, it is a study of conflict between homosexuality and religion and the story of an entire community having to deal with openly gay issues and having to formulate a new definition of pluralism and diversity within the concept of Judaic thought. As I sat and watched the film my eyes constantly teared for several reasons---I was proud to be who I am, I was proud of Shulamit Izen, the 9th grade Jewish lesbian who spearheaded the whole thing, I was proud of her fellow students, her community, her rabbi and proud of Keshet. I was amazed to see the strength of the teachers and the compassion of Shulamit’s fellow students but more than everything else I was proud of my religion for allowing me to be who I am.
When Shulamit enters the 9th grade at the New Jewish High School she did so because she was searching for a closer connection with her faith. She also did so as a lesbian. She wants to embrace the Jewish concept of pluralism—a concept that is integral to the Jewish religion but was afraid that the concept did not include lesbianism. During her investigation, she is swept up in a community trying to find itself as it faced the concepts of Jewish tradition and social change.
Looking at the concept of “hineni” or “here I am” presents a question, if I know who I am and I am here beside you, then who are you and what do you represent? If I can be me then I expect you to be you and look at me and accept me for who I am just as I do for you.
“Hineni”, the film, is not just about being gay but creating a place that allows one to be gay and be safe, where important problems can be openly discussed. For so long Jewish gays and lesbians have been told by rabbis that they could not be religious and be gay. Rabbi Daniel Lehmann who shows his uneasiness with the issue at the beginning of the film presents the thesis of the issue when he states, “the core of our tradition is to bring together those conflicting opinions not in an attempt to somehow resolve them or create harmony, but to actually live in the tension of those differences.”
In looking back at my own experiences when dealing with my issues of being gay and being Jewish and trying to relate to what was going on with Shulamit in Boston, I was taken aback yet again when I realize how far we have come in the world today. When I realized I was gay, I thought I was the only one. I had no one to talk to, I was filed with self guilt and the proper definition of the word gay hardly applied to me. Today it is so easy to be gay and youngsters today come out a good deal earlier and do not suffer from the problems we had when coming out to both ourselves and our community. What Shulamit Izen did was something of a miracle; she courageously took on not just a community but a religion that for so long said that we have no place. She created a place for us but more important she created a place for young Jews to feel at home. When I came out I would not have dared to do what she did and now that she has done so others will not have to live in fear or exclusion.
The word “hineni” meaning here I am comes from the book of Genesis in the Old Testament when Abraham answers G-d’s demand that he sacrifice Isaac. It is sop easy to see how this became the title for the movie. As Abraham had to reconcile his love for G-d with the love of his son and potential sacrifice, so did Shulamit have to reconcile her own inner struggle with Judaism and sexuality. We have heard over and over again that we are created in the image of G-d and that all of us are part of Him. Yet sometimes we feel that love of G-d is actually given to us when we love someone of the same sex. It is especially hurtful when one tries to make peace with his maker trough devotion and prayer and who feels that he is unheeded. One of the beautiful things that this movie shows us is to approach an issue, an ideal devoutly and without fear of reprisal. A loss can only be a minor upset when faith is strong. Shula(mit) managed to shake up the existing order and in doing so opened the gates of inclusion. Not only did other students come out but four teachers who had been “hiding” in the closet did also.
This is such an important movie. To see one teenager take on a system and risk alienation—not only from her elders and her peers but from her religion is something we do not often get to see. It is one thing to struggle with G-d and Mosaic Law. Jews have always enjoyed the struggle. To struggle and to take on an entire community is something else altogether. Her struggle made any future struggle that much easier.
Shula showed the great qualities of eagerness, idealism and emotion that we tend not to associate with teenagers today. She would not have been able to do what she did 10 years ago and even when she came forward in 2001 she pushed the envelope—especially by doing so within the boundaries of an orthodox religion. Even though Shulamit Izen is the main character and the catalyst for change here this is also the story of a community, a community that grew to accept our existence and not blot us from memory. This is not the story of one girl’s activism, it is the chronicle of a pluralistic community dealing and struggling with the life of modern America. That struggle is our struggle and it is sure nice to know that we have people like Shulamit Izen to help us out.
Some of you may feel that the reason I have acted so positively to this film is because I am Jewish myself. I suppose that there is some truth in that. I know my battle was a lonely one-one of hidi9ng and self denial until I moved to Israel where I became an activist and help change the order of things through demonstrations and law suits. What I did in Israel was not based upon religious ideals but strictly for equal acceptance into society. I had pushed my religious issues aside. When I returned to the States, remained a secular but nationalistic Jew. It was Hurricane Katrina that brought me back to my faith—for two reasons. The first reason was that I made it through that horrible experience and the second reason was that living in a new place caused in me a need for community, something I did not find in gay Arkansas. Now I have both—a wonderful and accepting Jewish community who lets me be who I am and the beginnings of a vibrant gay community which came about through my work in creating Cinema Pride and Literary Pride. I have returned to my religion because I could reconcile my convictions. I have tried to build a community of gay people where there was not one. I can’t help but think how much easier it would be to have done so with a power house like Shulamit Izen working with me.
Amos Lassen and Cinema Pride
When I first heard about this movie, I looked everywhere to try to get a copy. No matter where I looked I found brilliant reviews and powerful reactions but I could not seem to locate the film. I finally made contact with a group in Boston named Keshet (Hebrew for rainbow) which produced the film. Keshet is a support group for Jewish gays and lesbians and if this movie is an example of the kind of work they do then they have made quite a mark on the lives of our community and have done something that they can really be proud of. I, personally, have only had minor problems reconciling my Judaism with my gayness and I arrived at inner peace after a great deal of soul searching, self pity and inner conflict. I, finally, was alone to make peace with myself and G-d, but when I watched “Hineni”, I wished that a film like that had been around when I was dealing with my issues.
“Hineni” which is Hebrew for “here I am” is the story of a young girl’s attempt to establish a gay/straight alliance at a Jewish high school in Boston, Massachusetts and how that attempt affected everyone around. But even more than that, it is a study of conflict between homosexuality and religion and the story of an entire community having to deal with openly gay issues and having to formulate a new definition of pluralism and diversity within the concept of Judaic thought. As I sat and watched the film my eyes constantly teared for several reasons---I was proud to be who I am, I was proud of Shulamit Izen, the 9th grade Jewish lesbian who spearheaded the whole thing, I was proud of her fellow students, her community, her rabbi and proud of Keshet. I was amazed to see the strength of the teachers and the compassion of Shulamit’s fellow students but more than everything else I was proud of my religion for allowing me to be who I am.
When Shulamit enters the 9th grade at the New Jewish High School she did so because she was searching for a closer connection with her faith. She also did so as a lesbian. She wants to embrace the Jewish concept of pluralism—a concept that is integral to the Jewish religion but was afraid that the concept did not include lesbianism. During her investigation, she is swept up in a community trying to find itself as it faced the concepts of Jewish tradition and social change.
Looking at the concept of “hineni” or “here I am” presents a question, if I know who I am and I am here beside you, then who are you and what do you represent? If I can be me then I expect you to be you and look at me and accept me for who I am just as I do for you.
“Hineni”, the film, is not just about being gay but creating a place that allows one to be gay and be safe, where important problems can be openly discussed. For so long Jewish gays and lesbians have been told by rabbis that they could not be religious and be gay. Rabbi Daniel Lehmann who shows his uneasiness with the issue at the beginning of the film presents the thesis of the issue when he states, “the core of our tradition is to bring together those conflicting opinions not in an attempt to somehow resolve them or create harmony, but to actually live in the tension of those differences.”
In looking back at my own experiences when dealing with my issues of being gay and being Jewish and trying to relate to what was going on with Shulamit in Boston, I was taken aback yet again when I realize how far we have come in the world today. When I realized I was gay, I thought I was the only one. I had no one to talk to, I was filed with self guilt and the proper definition of the word gay hardly applied to me. Today it is so easy to be gay and youngsters today come out a good deal earlier and do not suffer from the problems we had when coming out to both ourselves and our community. What Shulamit Izen did was something of a miracle; she courageously took on not just a community but a religion that for so long said that we have no place. She created a place for us but more important she created a place for young Jews to feel at home. When I came out I would not have dared to do what she did and now that she has done so others will not have to live in fear or exclusion.
The word “hineni” meaning here I am comes from the book of Genesis in the Old Testament when Abraham answers G-d’s demand that he sacrifice Isaac. It is sop easy to see how this became the title for the movie. As Abraham had to reconcile his love for G-d with the love of his son and potential sacrifice, so did Shulamit have to reconcile her own inner struggle with Judaism and sexuality. We have heard over and over again that we are created in the image of G-d and that all of us are part of Him. Yet sometimes we feel that love of G-d is actually given to us when we love someone of the same sex. It is especially hurtful when one tries to make peace with his maker trough devotion and prayer and who feels that he is unheeded. One of the beautiful things that this movie shows us is to approach an issue, an ideal devoutly and without fear of reprisal. A loss can only be a minor upset when faith is strong. Shula(mit) managed to shake up the existing order and in doing so opened the gates of inclusion. Not only did other students come out but four teachers who had been “hiding” in the closet did also.
This is such an important movie. To see one teenager take on a system and risk alienation—not only from her elders and her peers but from her religion is something we do not often get to see. It is one thing to struggle with G-d and Mosaic Law. Jews have always enjoyed the struggle. To struggle and to take on an entire community is something else altogether. Her struggle made any future struggle that much easier.
Shula showed the great qualities of eagerness, idealism and emotion that we tend not to associate with teenagers today. She would not have been able to do what she did 10 years ago and even when she came forward in 2001 she pushed the envelope—especially by doing so within the boundaries of an orthodox religion. Even though Shulamit Izen is the main character and the catalyst for change here this is also the story of a community, a community that grew to accept our existence and not blot us from memory. This is not the story of one girl’s activism, it is the chronicle of a pluralistic community dealing and struggling with the life of modern America. That struggle is our struggle and it is sure nice to know that we have people like Shulamit Izen to help us out.
Some of you may feel that the reason I have acted so positively to this film is because I am Jewish myself. I suppose that there is some truth in that. I know my battle was a lonely one-one of hidi9ng and self denial until I moved to Israel where I became an activist and help change the order of things through demonstrations and law suits. What I did in Israel was not based upon religious ideals but strictly for equal acceptance into society. I had pushed my religious issues aside. When I returned to the States, remained a secular but nationalistic Jew. It was Hurricane Katrina that brought me back to my faith—for two reasons. The first reason was that I made it through that horrible experience and the second reason was that living in a new place caused in me a need for community, something I did not find in gay Arkansas. Now I have both—a wonderful and accepting Jewish community who lets me be who I am and the beginnings of a vibrant gay community which came about through my work in creating Cinema Pride and Literary Pride. I have returned to my religion because I could reconcile my convictions. I have tried to build a community of gay people where there was not one. I can’t help but think how much easier it would be to have done so with a power house like Shulamit Izen working with me.